Sarah’s Chronicles: The Drama Sickens
Rod Tanzol
“Achoo!” sneezed our allegedly human heroine. Her face was sallow, her nose running mucus and snot profusely. Her body ached. She could barely move. She was immobilized in her computer seat, with her headset donned.
“God bless you, Sarah,” Cisco wished over countless miles of infrastructure and electromagnetic waves.
Sarah grunted into her microphone, and then answered in a sullen and raspy tone, “She made me sick!”
“Who?” Cisco foolishly inquired. Has he not yet learned that he should know the identities of all pronouns used by Sarah? Who was “she”? Was “she” a family member? Was “she” a friend? Was “she” an enemy? Was “she” a teacher? Perhaps, “she” referred to God? Despite any uncertainty, Cisco must have been a horrible person for not knowing!
Angrily Sarah responded straining her voice, “Who do you think? My good-for-nothing, computer-illiterate, bandwidth-consuming sister got me sick!”
“Those were harsh words, eh?”
“You’re Filipino; stop sucking in the maple syrup, eh?” Sarah barked with stinging emphasis on her last syllable. However, she coughed afterwards, voiding all effectiveness of her statement.
“You’re Puerto Rican; wave the right flag, Boricua!”
She was stunned. “How did you find that out?” she asked.
“Joe told me on Steam.”
“How did you contact him, Cisco?”
“He contacted me. You share chat logs way too often, missy.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay, Sarah; I still love you! However, one thing bothers me.”
“What is it?”
“What did you do over the weekend?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“You don’t have to. Joe told me everything.”
“Then, why are you asking me?”
“Because I care. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t tell you, Cisco, because I didn’t want you to worry. I know how worthless, incapable, and inadequate you feel all the way up in Canada.”
“Thanks,” he said sardonically. Though, he continued lecturing, “Well, I’m more worried because someone else told me what happened. What’s with the secrecy? Aren’t we beyond that?”
“I’m sorry,” Sarah said with a crackle in her voice. She wanted to cry, but she was too sick.
Cisco replied reassuringly, “It’s all okay. Just don’t be afraid to hurt my feelings. I love you!”
Sarah was elated to hear this, but she was too sick to truly express herself. She sneezed, and removed her headset. She went to bed. She didn’t know what time it was, or when she would get better. She only knew that she was sick. “Screw all obligations!” she thought to herself. She fell asleep, and disappeared into her own world…
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